Wedding Vows, They're not just for the ceremony. They're for life! 

With spiraling prices, the average UK wedding cost currently stands at an incredible £18,000.00, yet the most important part of your wedding; your vows, come absolutely free – but priceless if spoken from the heart.

How to write your own vow: -

The Basics…

If we dissect the traditional Christian vows, it’s not just about words; it’s about lifelong commitment no matter what life throws at you, a commitment that should be the undertone of any personal vows you write.

  • Traditional Christian vow: - I, (Name) , take you, (Name) , to be my wife/husband, to have and to hold from this day forward; for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us do part; according to God's holy law. In the presence of God I make this vow. Overcome your concerns…

One of the biggest concerns you may have when writing your vows is how it compares to your partners. Will it be too long, too short, or not have the same impact etc. Well, to overcome this, sit down with your partner and agree a word count and structure you both adhere too. You may also decide on the same beginning to each promise, and to end each vow with the same sentence such as I will love you forever.

Word Count…

A 100 - 150 word count is about the norm. Whether you decide on more or less is entirely up to you, but don’t however make it so long the guests lose interest.

Structure…

Simply start at the beginning with key milestones as the foundation to go through the past, present and future. Or you can jump straight to the future with vows of commitment to the marriage.

  • The past, Your feeling when you first met, when you fell in love and when you realised he / she was the one for you.
  • The present Mention those special things that make your relationship – the way they hold you, their smile, how they make you laugh, or how they comfort you in time of sadness etc.
  • And, the future Vow your commitment to the future. Key promises to show your declaration of intent, be it characteristics you currently have or intend to improve upon. Example, I promise to always care for you. And maybe throw a little humour in by promising to try to understand the offside rule.

If you find yourself struggling to put your emotions in writing, you can consult with professional writers who will work alongside you to script your vows.

Tone…

Be it romantic, silly, humorous, light-hearted, serious, or a combination, always remember your vows should have a serious undertone denoting a lifelong pledge to each other.

Whatever tone you choose, both partners should use the same to avoid one appearing to be less committed than the other. (One being full of humour with the other being serious will not come across well)

Clichés…

I squirm with embarrassment each time I hear clichés like “you complete me” or “you melt my heart” used during a vow. Be yourself - using your own words and feelings will come over as sincere.

Time will tell…

Once you have completed the writing of your vows, walk away from it for several days, and then re-read them and make any necessary amendments. You will surprised how a little time will make all the difference to help you get it right.

A second opinion…

Read your vows to a trusted friend or family member to ask for their 100% honest opinion.

Practice, practice, practice…

With the vows completed, practice the presentation. Good presentation will bring your vows alive but don’t be too worried about it; choking on the day will show your sincerity.

Frame your vows …

Frame your vows and hang them up on the wall to provide a constant reminder (especially through troubled times) of what your marriage truly means to you.

I Do was last modified: April 15th, 2016 by Gabriella

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